Garden of Eden
by RiverSong98
Summary: What if River hadn't died? What if the Doctor had handcuffed HER to the machine instead? He would have regenerated, wouldn't he? Set in the Library.


One Shots

_**What if River hadn't died? What if the Doctor had handcuffed HER to the machine instead? He would have regenerated, wouldn't he?**_

**This is an idea that came to me while writing another fic of mine. I pondered it for a moment then thought, **_**what the hell!**_

**Set from when the Doctor (in this case River) wakes up handcuffed.**

I look around, groggy. My face is throbbing. Then I remember what is happening. "NO!" I yell as I look up. "What are you doing?! That's my job!"

"Well, I'm not allowed to do anything, I suppose?" The Doctor who isn't my doctor says, strangely calm.

I try to get to him, to slap some sense into him, but I feel a tug on my wrist. I look around and see that I'm handcuffed to the machinery.

"Why am I handcuffed? Why do you even have handcuffs? I thought you were against violence!" I say, resisting the urge to add an innuendo there, knowing that this man wouldn't understand.

He just ignored my comment, continuing with what he was doing with a smirk on his face.

"This is not a joke! Stop this now. This is going to kill you! I have a chance but you don't have any. And don't even think you'll regenerate!" I yell, pleading. My mask of flirtation was slipping, my true feelings bleeding through.

"I'm timing it for the end of the countdown. There'll be a blip in command flow. That way it should improve our chances of a clean download." He says to me, shaking a little.

"Doctor, no!" I cry

"Funny thing is, this means you've always known how I was going to die. I'll never get a chance to tell you now. Never tell you my name, my true name. Oh well. I've seen how well you think of me. I can see it in your eyes. Remember me, River. Remember who I really am."

"The last time I saw you, the real you, the future you I mean, you turned up on my doorstep with a new haircut and a suit. You took me to Durillium, to see the singing towers. Oh, what a night that was. The towers sang and you cried. You never told me why but I suppose you knew it was time. You knew it was time for me to go to the library. You thought it was me who would die, but you stopped it. I saw the envelope in your hand when you dropped me off. You've gone and made a tear in the universe. You could destroy it, damn it! All because you're so selfish. I can't believe you!" I scream through the tears. "If you die here, it'll mean I never met you."

"Time can be rewritten!" he yells.

I look down, trying to calm down, but I can't. He means too much to me. "Not those times, not one line. Don't you dare." I say, almost a whisper.

"It's ok. It's not over for you. You still have a long life ahead of you, a long time to live. I'll see you again someday. You and me. Time and space. You watch us run." he says. I can't even look at him. I just stare at the sonic screwdriver that he has left me just out of my reach and let the tears stream down my face, a constant companion now.

"Hush now" he says, in that tone that always comforts me. "Goodbye"

"For now" he adds as he connects the wires.

I look away. I can't watch that man who means so much to me die.

I don't even cry out as I break my wrist to get out of the handcuffs. I'm dead inside, as I walk away, having not looked back until I am almost out the door.

"Doctor?" I whisper as I glance over to where he had been sitting. His body is still there. _That isn't right_ I think, as I look it over, checking that it's really him.

I run over to him and feel his chest. No double heartbeat. I pick him up. He's surprisingly light for someone his size. I carry his body out of there and into the TARDIS, Donna on my heels, demanding to know what happened. I can't tell her, I can't speak at all as I wander down the corridors until I find the room I have been looking for.

Donna tries to follow me, but when I swing round and she sees the look in my eyes, she stops in her tracks. She can see that I have just lost the biggest part of my life.

"I… I'll go," she mutters as she turns and walks off.

I turn back to the door. It's quite plain for what is behind it. Just a simple silver-wood door, like from the trees of his home. On it is carved 'farewell' in Gallifreyan. A fitting tribute from this ship to her owner. I know that this wood is real. He once told me that this door existed, and what is was made of. I think he always thought of it as a farewell to his home, but I have always known. He would find solace in coming here and just feeling the wood on the long nights when nightmares plagued him. He told me once that he has never opened that door, but I know that it is time.

The door swings open as I step up to it. I'm glad, because it means I don't have to put him down. I look in and all around me, I can see it. His home. The TARDIS has recreated Gallifrey perfectly. It's like a Garden of Eden. And in the middle of it all, a beautiful stone bench, polished to perfection. It swirls with colour and glows from within. It is constantly changing and stops occasionally to show who he was or should have been.

I put him down on the strangely soft top. The design asserted itself to the one most appropriate to this Doctor, the one with the 3D glasses and converse. I sit with him for a long time, not counting as the minutes turn into hours turn into days.

Eventually I give up on the hope that he could come back, turn into my Doctor. I get up, brush the red dust off of my spacesuit and walk out. I hold my head high, like he would have told me to.

I close the door behind me resolving myself to never go back. I go out, get changed and drop Donna back. All the things that were supposed to happen now never will. But, somehow, the universe is still holding together.

I start to wander the corridors at night, just so I don't have to sleep in that bed that still smells of him. I have no idea how long this goes on, but I think the TARDIS has had enough.

She leads me to the room. The one room I resolved never to enter again. She opens the door and I can feel her urging me in.

I go in, and she closes the door behind me. Something is wrong. Something has changed. I look really carefully, but I can't tell what it is.

It takes me a while, but I eventually realize. The design on the bench has changed. Rather than the glasses and shoes, it now has the fez and bowtie of my Doctor.

I rush to his side and lay my head on his chest. There! That double heartbeat that has always given me hope. I double check, sure that I'm just missing him.

That's when I see a faint glow around his hands. I step back. I know what is going to happen now.

His body explodes in a burst of golden light and I laugh as the weight that has been pressing down on me disappears.

The TARDIS shakes, and I know that it's not out of joy.

I hate to leave him, but I need to check what is happening. I run as fast as I can to the console room.

It's been torn apart. I run around, wondering what has caused this when I realize. It's my Doctor. He caused this. I couldn't be happier about the TARDIS being destroyed.

In he walks, a little disorientated. I laugh as he yells "I'm a girl!" as his voice cracks.

"What's happening?" he yells over the bangs and crashes in the voice that I know oh so well.

"We're crashing!" I reply, and he joins me at the console.

**There you go! I hope you like it!**


End file.
